The season of waiting...

Half way there! boy! it feels forever, but at the same time its going by so swiftly ...

Pregnancy is what we know as the season of waiting! is the season of preparation, to make room for your little gift that soon will fill your world with the most wonderful memories, but also for me is that season where everything seems upside down. For example, my first trimester is brutal! the morning sickness lasts about...well... lets see... the whole 9 months, and the anemia drops me so low,  that I feel I have no energy to do anything! and not to mention  my smell powers, that isolate me from the world! yes, this scenario my friends, seem to be the constant in every single of my pregnancies. Did I mentioned it before? this, will be my fifth? well now, I have so much to do and all those body changes and adjustments sort of slow me down and here is where my season of waiting starts to appear so long and tedious.

I know of many moms having a great time during their pregnancy, and they have what we call: the glow! you know? the glow? ahhh I wish I had that glow...  It takes me almost until the sixth month to be back in society hahaha, and that's where I am right now, so I am finally starting to see the light.  It isn't easy for me to slow down, I am very active and love to be outside doing fun things with the kids, plus the homeschool comes into play, so when pregnancy issues show up, I feel pulled back.

Recently I have been meditating on being busy in my last post here and also in dealing with discouragement here, but I found a beautiful truth in this season of waiting. Let me show you. As I feel overwhelmed by all those symptoms, I forget at times the marvelous miracle that is taking place in my body, the wonders of life have been granted generously by God to me and here I am deliberately getting lost only in the physical experience.

When I have to do "sofa rest" by doctor orders, I have the time to think and take care of me, and also the time to experience my baby. I can look closely to what is happening around with my older kids. I look at them in detail their faces, I  study their voices and hear in the background their interesting conversations developing. You see? I have been granted a season to freeze time and really enjoy the life around me and inside me.

Pregnancy brings so much that I seem to miss it, it brings me tenderness so I can  stop being strong for a while, It allows others to take over and practice charity by helping me and comforting me while simultaneously brings me humility to accept the help and surrender to my fragile state. It grants me from time to time vulnerability so I can accept me in the good and in the bad, when I am productive and when I am not. It offers me consciousness of healthy choices for me and the baby, such as diet, sleep and rest. Caring of me is a struggle to maintain, so this season slows the pace allowing me to see these things. At last it brings patience, to my anxious and rushed planning making lifestyle, pregnancy is unpredictable and that teaches you patience with yourself and time.

This time is a flashback, I now see how quickly time goes by when I realize how much my other kids have grown, and see it all in a wide view, I see how my season of waiting invites me to appreciate, life, health, love, moments, to enjoy every instant and this baby on the making as the greatest miracle! I am ready to welcome my baby, I am ready to take life as it comes, I keep waiting for more blessings, and as a picture shots "I am keeping all these things in my heart" like our Heavenly mother did, I will learn to say: Fiat "let it be done according to Your will"

One day at the time is how this season of waiting unfolds the most beautiful truths; pregnancy can be overwhelming, but above it all, is a call to witness life, love and sacrifice in its maximum expression. Don't feel afraid to discover your fears during pregnancy and your vulnerabilities, open to receive and to learn, all of this is a journey, meant to be lived, worth to be experienced!


To my kids:
Please just...
Never grow up!

Let's talk curriculum!

As mentioned in the past here, our curriculum choice is one of the reasons we homeschool; I fell in love with the content, its pace, and the many wonderful products they offer. Our curriculum of choice is Catholic Heritage Curricula. We have used it exclusively since the very beginning. It is classic and faith based, but also simple and easy to use. 

Kids love to unwrap their new books! there is nothing better than this for a homeschooler 😇

CHC caught my attention from the very beginning by the innocent overall theme. If you look at their catalogs you will see that they are motherly and classic, so my first impression pointed me to the innocence of the program. I wanted that in my homeschool! besides, it was faith based: most of their books are enriched by the truths of the Faith and the Magisterium. For example: their spelling, handwriting and grammar, add bible verses and apologetics early on. Their science and social studies approach, is outlined with a strong faith and reason perspective, that walks paralleled with the history of the church! it is truly careful and intentionally crafted, I love that! Also the gentle approach and their rigor allows you from the First to the Fourth grade to have a four day schedule, giving you and your students a break right in the middle of the week! 

I liked the fact that offers pre-made planners, that organize your subjects, lessons and daily activities within a 32-36 week range for you! in addition includes teacher manuals and tips to help you introduce the concepts to your students. This  is a great plus when you have no teaching background!

I am just learning the homeschool world and I am not very familiar with the variety of products and latest reviews, so I try to play safe and go with what I like and began to know.  CHC shaped my days and the goals of our homeschool, I have learned to expand my resources to my rhythm and comfort. To begin, I started with the core subjects and as we grew confident of what we were capable to do, we explored their enrichment books. We love their art program, music studies and Latin readers series.

One of my biggest fears at the beginning - speaking truth here- was teaching my kids to read. As you know by now, my English is a work in progress, so to even imagine teaching my children to read correctly, was a reason of concern. CHC has the sweetest books and an easy program for readers to introduce phonics and spelling. As a matter of fact it help me, to improve my pronunciation and spelling -one is never old to learn new things from the basic places- yes! the kids and I were enriched by this very program.

I have nothing but great things to say about CHC, we used it exclusively for now, but we are open to enhance in other places too, we help ourselves with online resources, library books and such. I can recommend it for all elementary, we just began middle school with my oldest and so far we are enjoying it very much. They are always improving and updating their programs so there is much to explore yet. 

CHC is not an online school, so there is not a tuition or enrollment fees to pay, they simply offer families a great selection of curricula to educate your children at home; the heart of their philosophy is mainly to cultivate the life of your "domestic church".

I am sure there is plenty of other methods and curricula out there that are great too. We have for now found a solid base, it has been fruitful for our family, not only because it has taught our children the subjects in the light of the Catholic Church, but it has renovated our faith as an adults in the process.

Easy Lunch: Hot dogs with a Colombian twist!

Today I had the cravings 😏.

I was dreaming of Colombian hot dogs!

Same concept, but with couple of add-ons we just love! So, if you want to try a twist on your hot dogs, this may work! my bonus here: a simple new sauce you are just going to love... We call it "pink sauce".

Let's begin:

INGREDIENTS

• Hot dogs
• Hot dogs buns
• Shredded cheese (we love Colby jack)
• Minced pineapple
• Mayonnaise
• Ketchup
• 1/2 lime
• Potato chips (original flavor)
• Salt
• Pepper
• Optional: Tabasco sauce and banana peppers

1.  Get your hot dogs boiling for about 15 minutes

2. Meanwhile, gather your "pink sauce ingredients: 1 part of mayonnaise, half part of ketchup, juice from half of a lime and salt and pepper to taste.

3. Next, mixed them all together until creamy. Here you can add tabasco sauce if desired.

You may also use this "pink sauce" as a dip for shrimp!

4. Put a small amount of potato chips in a Ziploc bag and seal it.

5. Fun step for my kids!

and... Smash it!

6. Now you have your hot dogs cooked and your toppings at hand!

7. Assemble your hot dog and top it off in layers with the cheese, pineapple, crushed potato chips and the condiments of choice; we add: mustard, ketchup and the "pink sauce" , also you can add banana peppers for a spice kick!

8. Here you have it! Now enjoy a feast of flavors!

Kids here did! It was lollipop's first Colombian hot dog and she went right at it!

Craving solitude in the midst of "busy"

Busy, busy, busy! That's how our times are outlined anymore. Aren't they? We have become an energetic, driven, fast paced generation that have found its worth in productivity and level of success. We basically are making "busyness" the newest idol and we are placing it in the highest altars of our priorities; but the question remains... Is it bearing fruit? Is it achieving our longing pursuit of happiness? Is it really worth it?
Or is it instead interfering with our families, self-esteem and spirituality?...

When I arrived to the US, and began my life away from my home and family I gained an unbelievable freedom to achieve anything life wanted to offer. I worked and pushed my self to learn the language, I studied and worked some more. It was my time to build and I didn't hesitate. I came to learn from Americans the drive and tenacity I always admired. Multitasking became my new nature, "busy" was now my new partner at play,  and my youth was my biggest asset to achieve it. It was just exhilarating to enter the fast lane, its was attractive! 

Our society is wide in offering a vast variety of choices in how to keep you productive so you will fit the frame of "accomplished". From work overtime to second and third job one can be considered thriving; but not to worry any free time in between is also under the care of this "thoughtful society". Here, you are offered hobbies and numerous activities to keep you up until exhaustion. You say yes! To every possible event, it is almost the hardest thing to say no anymore, you have to be everywhere and cannot miss it, there is only the "now" what matters. Don't take me wrong working hard is good, is a  quality one needs to build character and finding new  interests is healthy; but my main concern here is how it slowly invades all your time to the point to feel uneasy if you are simply unoccupied. It is that void you feel after work, after you are done with an activity and you end up saying... Now what? Is that need to fill that void busyness leaves you with. The thrill is over now what do I do with myself?

Apparently being exhausted is not the end of the rope, we seem to push for activities that  take us away from silence or... is it from ourselves?... Noise, and overload of images have taking over our restless minds and hearts. But could this restlessness be a sign that we deeply crave solitude? maybe we just don't know how to make it fruitful? We have lost the ability to rest, meditate and ponder.

I came upon this very subject not too long ago. My life at times feels "busy", I feel exhausted, I long for peace, I am getting tired of rushing.  But wait? rushing what? I am not longer in the world competing and proving myself I am at home with my loved ones, what am I rushing then?  life? kids? my home? Is it not home where you should find rest? then why I am allowing "busy" to poison the very heart of my happiness? Why I am exposing my kids unnecessarily to the tyranny of productivity?

Let me elaborate: Doing things can make you feel accomplished but overdoing things can burn your spirit in any area of your life. Exhaustion either buries you or allows you to see the right perspective. This time of exhaustion in my life gave me the right view of what is important, happiness and peace. All the works mean nothing if you feel burnt inside, neither homeschooling or  parenting can bear fruit under pressure. I have to learn to let life unfold on its own pace and present itself at its right time, I have to learn  to put my priorities in order.

Things such as, time to pray or just to think, can be an impossible space to accommodate. It is important, if not essential to allow time to just be, to enjoy, and ponder, it is important to regain silence. How can one hear God or think of God in the midst of chaos? introspective and time to yourself are more productive than any other activity, it bears real fruit, it secures ones soul, ones purpose. 

What happened to leisure? to stillness? to the peaceful moments of past generations? weren't they much fruitful? weren't they deeper, serene, paced and pleasant? I crave that! I guess at times specially in chaos, I crave solitude, I crave depth.   Solitude in motherhood is  essential  to find oneself again, to gain ground in the spirit, so one can offer the children what it is now attained. 

Busy homes are sign of life, but to enrich that life it is necessary to open space for reflection;  kids need it, so their souls can be open to receive and perceive. For that and more, I am encouraged to continue my search for balance, my search for authenticity, to reinvent myself to simplicity. I will stop wanting to be busy to fill the void, I will stop placing "busy" in the highest of my priorities, I will find my worth in "being" instead of "doing", I will learn to say "no" more often and find spaces of tranquility, I will give my soul a breath to release what is toxic, I will be open to solitude to give my soul a rest!

Happy Independence Day Colombia!

Happy Independence Day Colombia!

Feliz Dia de Independecia Colombia!

Today, I thought, I give you a quick tour to my country Colombia!

My beautiful Colombia has been blessed with two oceans, thanks to its almost perfect location in the top corner side of the south of the American continent. Outlined by the majestic mountain range of "Los Andes" lays the most exotic vegetation, from stunning variety of flowers, to its rich diversity of fruits and crops! Our coffee for example is  well known to be one "the best of the world". We proud ourselves for being one of the countries with the most diverse kind of birds. We also have "pink dolphins" yes! they swim about our flamboyant  Amazon river.

This video will walk you through the land!

and will give you a taste of our music 🎶  Enjoy!

Our land is almost paradise, we have little bit of every possible natural scenario, we have beaches, islands, deserts, mountains peaks where snows, jungles, and prairies.

Our land is clothed in so many rivers, that puts us on the top of the richest hydrographical zones of the planet; its most important as previously mentioned: "The Amazon". Our best products go from Emeralds, to roses, to cotton, to bananas, textiles and oil.

Weather goes by altitude, we do not have seasons because of our closeness to the Equator. So depending how close you are to the ocean level it gets warmer, and where I am from is mountain, where the capital stands: Bogota, the weather there is steady cold all year long.

Our strong Spanish influence makes  the architectural beauty of our towns and cities magical! from balconies, and plazas to the most stunning cathedrals.

I had the chance to visit earlier this year and I was able to enjoy once again of my beautiful city, friends, food and music.

Our "ajiaco" just a very creamy soup for a cold day!

Here our famous "picada" and Coca cola off course!

Strawberries and cream! my old time favorite!

A cute display of The best Colombian coffee in a traditional "chiva" or little bus!

And... my school friends 💖

So this is a small window of my beautiful Colombia... meanwhile we will play some super banco Colombia, or the Colombian version of monopoly!

Have a great day! and remember:

Once upon a clutter... "The sequel"

Coming from the latest post about decluttering Here, I mentioned  how important it is for  us to keep up daily routine and maintenance of our home. With homeschool and daily living, things can get pretty hectic. Overall preserving from chaos brings just the right balance to carry on our activities. So here is just a simple scheme of how our method works for our family.

Let's say everything for us begins at night... yes! our starting point is right at dinner time. By then we are all done with school activities and maybe, we are back from running errands or just from being out. So here in about 6 steps is how the magic happens! 🌠

• We prepare and serve dinner.
• We wash the dishes, clean counters, sweep and mop the floor; in other words we clean the kitchen and leave it ready for the next morning.
• Kids clean and organize the after-school mess and leave the room and supplies also tidy for the next day.
• We take showers at night, so while that happens for everyone, we go around picking up clutter and assembling clothes for the following day.
• Kids get ready for bed after night prayers.
• Mom or dad or sometimes both, tackle laundry.  We switch and fold the "loads" while popping a movie. (it just makes things better 😏). We make for each member a pile to be placed where it belongs the next morning .

The three musketeers work together after dinner!

It may sound strict, in a way maybe it is, but we make it as pleasant as possible. Some days we accomplish everything and some others we don't. But to know that picking up at night reduces the stress in the morning is a pretty good incentive. We don't have a set schedule of who does what, we tackle it together, we find this little ritual a place to bond and share and contribute.

With a growing family of 5 little ones we have found the importance of teaching basic skills. Kids are more than ready to feel part of the family team! letting our kids be part of such an important daily task has made them feel that they belong and that their input makes a difference. Never underestimate how generous their little hearts can be and never be so proud to carry the load alone!

Hope some of the tips I shared are helpful or at least interesting to you.

What tips help you keep up your home tidy?

The less traveled road: Our Homeschool Quest Story

Maybe not the less traveled road anymore; the choice of homeschool seems to be growing by the numbers lately, but it was a very foreign land to me when back in 2009 I began this "quest" of homeschooling my first child.

Let's begin with a little background; many people seem to have a profile for homeschoolers here in the US; homeschoolers are timid, nerds, religious fanatics or even strictly reserved to the outcasts. Personally I was unaware of what homeschool was until I met my husband. I graduated from a private Catholic school in Bogota, Colombia. Where I am from, our youth studies in a private or public school, period, maybe some tutoring on the side but, I never heard before of mothers schooling at home their children; so with that in mind I had no prejudice or rehearsed opinion about homeschool when I made my choice.

As I mentioned before, the first homeschool person I met was my husband. So when he explained to me what it was, I was in awe to think that it was an education choice this country offered their people. Odd to me, but fascinating. Why fascinating? Because it brought​ back the classical tutoring school from the colonial times to one of the most advanced countries in the world! So It took me a while to wrap my head around that.

Only when my first born turned three I began to explore my school options. I was disappointed from the beginning, I wanted a private school but it was for our family astronomical impossible to pay. There was not middle. We did only the Pre-K year, but public or even charter did not end up convincing me. I wanted to offer the quality of education that I had: classical yet updated with out the costly tuition.

As we finished her VPK year in a local Christian school, I continued to search online for private education. Trying to get lucky I came about an appealing Catholic curriculum that brought back memories and new hopes of forming my children in the faith, but wait... What? Homeschool? What do you mean? I would have to do it all? like the whole thing? Uhmmm ... Nope. Next link please! I wasn't qualified... I continued to scroll my google search but not one local institution fit my needs, that one link called to me; my only problem? my job. I did not have the time, neither the preparation to educate, but as I looked back through the site I read how gentle approach their curriculum was meant to be and also how they offered a planned teacher manual that guided you to  teach your child the subjects! uhmmm... I liked that! why not? maybe we could try it for the summer and be ahead by the time we found a "suitable" school ...

I know that they are many schools that could fill the gap of getting my kids educated, I also know personally many amazing teachers, but what that summer did to my family has no price, that curriculum gave us wings! we shared remarkable milestones that as a working mother I would never witness if it wasn't for homeschool. It made our days fulfilling, we became involved, we shared our faith, we got a new view of what our family could become.

As time went by, I became more familiar with the curriculum and got the hang of it. I began to teach my child and learned to see every occasion as an educational opportunity. I still worked but decided I could do both. By the time my second baby came along I took a break and explored strongly the possibility of doing this full time. So  I did!

Exploring through this less traveled road: "homeschool" doesn't reveal the many challenges one has to go through.  Challenges like: how to homeschool your child plus a baby, how to homeschool different ages and grades, to burnout and exhaustion. This quest for fulfillment is hard! I had come close to quit millions of times; as I mentioned it before, I fell in love with this curriculum and for what it did with my family life. I was not going to quit then, and so far I haven't quit. Bottom line... the full picture at the end keeps my heart with homeschool.

Whatever your choice for education is for your child, remember: we are not meant to fit a cookie cutter, there is beauty in homeschooling, like there is in kids going to an institution, just keep in mind as a parent to enrich and witness as much as you can of these forming years with your kids. Each time of the day, each milestone they accomplish, be present, engage and celebrate!

This is a window through my choice, if you see you can relate I hope you enjoyed this reading, if you cannot relate at all, take the heart of it, and know we share motherhood, and even though we approach this subject differently we care immensely for our children and go through number of choices that define the shape our families.

I celebrate each one of you! Thanks for taking the time to read this post.

Reaching new heights!

"Love has protected me against worldliness: coteries, ambitions, advancements, interferences, alliances, secessions, roles, powers: love has made me into a social catastrophe to my delight"

Roland Barthes, A lover's discourse

Love... such a short word for all that entitles...

I strongly believe now that I became a mother, that the definition of love is a verb-action rather than a noun or feeling. When you become a mother you stop living for yourself, you realize swiftly how their fragile lives have been entrusted to you and YOU alone, therefore there is not room for the selfish trace of vanity or pride, only love gives you the push to expand your heart, to face your fears and conquer it all.

This motherhood journey of mine has transformed every space in my heart. I never really thought of a family as a goal, but it was giving to me as if my soul craved it insistently. I saw myself as and independent, assured, "successful" *cough* -will elaborate this farther on- woman, traveling abroad and achieving, many recognitions for changing the world one random act of kindness at the time. Ha! boy! was I far from it! ambitious little thing I am, not one but everything I wanted; maybe I needed to be taught a loving lesson...

Here, the good God in His infinite wisdom came as the Father and Teacher that He is, and took care of the narrow vision I had of myself and had fed over all these years. I thought I was a very kind and patient person, I called myself generous and  humble. Then... my "gift" arrived, my children! one by one they came and transformed me for good.

When my first daughter came, I was gifted with so much strength to thrive in life that I became empowered to achieve all those goals I once envisioned, but here is when the first twist came about, I no longer wanted it for me alone I wanted it for us, for her, she became the most valid reason. Then years went by and the weariness of motherhood began to fade the magic of the baby years, the challenges and real demands of love put me to the test. Remember how I thought I was such a patient person? uhm... not so much. Well, you see? I worked many years in customer service, in a supermarket, in a restaurant, in a hotel, in a bank, you name it, I covered all the possible fields that challenging human interaction could come up with, I was covered! motherhood was not my first challenge!  I told myself. ha! again. There were the first frustrating years of reasoning with a toddler and loosing it over spilled milk. Oh my small heart had some growing to do!

Then daughter two came along. She my little miracle came in a very fragile state when she arrived to the world weighting 3 and a half pounds. Because of complications in the 8th month she stopped growing in my womb and doctors acted quickly saving her life and mine. This was not how I planned it! I hate surgeries! but my daughter's life was and is more important than any of my fears. Her fragility outweighed my physical pain, the surgery was an emergency C-section and God knows what risks they saw, so if I could describe it, it was traumatic. With my first child I had chance to bond and take her home; with this baby I hardly had the chance to see her, only a few seconds after birth and few days later in the NICU. But... she made it in 10 days and we took her home! now we became a family of four.  Having two girls was fun! my oldest was getting older and we played more, I guess the experience of my preemie gave me perspective of how to let go a little and enjoy. Here she gave me her gift: It was humility. 

Then shortly after, we had our first boy! here I must confess my fear for boys haha; I was not ready for mess or potty training a boy, it was almost  an Olympic achievement to get my oldest trained and I was very close to finish training my second one; and now a boy? oh no, my superficial fears again! *face palm* I never knew how superficial I was until this stuff came to the surface. Also the idea of having another surgery didn't help but this time around, pregnancy and delivery were much pleasant than my previous one. He came in such a happy time for me. It was love at first sight, I never thought I could connect with a little boy the way we did, he was charming, and I fell right for him. Here he brought his gift: it was joy.

At this moment another adjustment was need it, I had to stop working and stay home with the kids, because it worked best for us, I felt better staying home and not having to worry being away. It felt good at the beginning, it really did! we started homeschooling and I was letting my creativity flow. But behind the curtain, pride and ego crept slowly into action. My dual battle began: The love for my kids clashed with my independence and ambitions. Here love called again and after much wrestling with myself, I discovered that I was capable to renounce once again to my selfish ambitions and give us a chance.

So far, renouncing is the common factor, it pains me to admit it, it shouldn't be this hard, but the love for these little ones has lift me to a new heights. I have renounced to fears, to professional prospects, to more income, to freedom, to my body; like the verse above says: "I became a social disaster". She failed, you must think;  she settled, others say, she lost her chance. But I can assure you that I have visited bitterly those thoughts in the darkness of my self and raised above them when I saw the glimpse of the full picture. It is not alone that you find yourself, you see? I thought I knew me, but it was in giving and loving when I discovered who I really was. For this and more I have God and my kids to thank. I became a better person when I let go of me, I reached new heights!

Now I am called to open space in my home and in my heart for the two little ones that joined our family. I am not going to pretend, the struggle is conquered; is real, is raw but as my heart calls for renouncing and expanding once more, I see it clear, there is not a cookie cutter or a mold one has to fit or follow; possibilities in love are endless; you only have to find that place inside of you, where nothing is impossible and when you find it, wear the wings of love and fly! I once wanted to be the arrow but now I am the archer that holds 5 in her quiver, God knows where they will land. No! I didn't gave up I only found another way to become successful, I found the force of love that conquers it all.

Hope this lengthy reflection had brought to you a space of pondering about motherhood and love. Thanks for stopping by!

Blessings

Liz